Women are so boring. Women are all “Rule 47b subsection 2 paragraph a states that sex cannot happen until” and then you have to fill out forms 450c, 36b and 22 a in triplicate by which time I’m like “Bored now”. I actually find the phrase “Bored now” quite effective, especially with strippers. Yawn and say “bored now” while they’re trying to talk to you, wait for the whole “I can make you less bored, give me money” speech and then be all, “meh, I can see naked women anywhere for free. So bored”. There are few things in life more amusing. Then pull out your phone and when they get agitated by this be all “Well I can give you £20 and see you naked or give the taxi driver £14 and go fuck my fuck buddy…….” riles them up no end. Especially when you show them the picture of your fuck buddy which shuts up the whole “Give me money for being skinny and having fake tits unlike your fuck buddy” gambit. You’re like “actually you could lose a few pounds and my fuck buddy has natural E cups which beat your fake C cups”.

I’ve found that the key to dealing with women is comporting yourself with two principles in mind: first you have someone better to do than the woman you’re talking with. Second their rejection means fuck all to you. Women like to think that they’re getting the best, so you have to ensure that they feel that you’re totally indifferent to them, that you are so used to banging the hottest women around that they are nothing to you. Never be afraid to disagree with a woman or find fault with her and always cultivate an air of being nearly falling asleep with boredom when you’re doing it, even talking to her should feel like an effort. Always be ready to throw out random questions “Have you read Kant?” “How can you not have read Kant?” Have you read questions like this are always good because it moves the battleground away from her body onto her mind. 99% of woman do not have an intellect and are not used to being called on it. 99% of women are used to having guys dribble over them and beg them for sex. You are the one guy who finds her mind numbingly boring, fucking her would be a chore to you.

It’s useful to have a wingman who should look bored as fuck throughout “She’s not read Kant” “What?” “She hasn’t read Kant” *deep sigh and look of disapproval*. Always, always have something better to do. You are going to a party, you are going to a different bar, you are going to hell because having your testicals pulled off by demons is preferable to being with this woman”. You and your wingman are bored and only the other members of the group are keeping you there. You’re only talking to her to kill the mind numbing boredom.

Then let her slowly win you over.


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