I feel like shit; I think my depression is deepening.
Dakota is back although communication has not as yet been reestablished. I think this irritates me more than usual; if there was some kind of attempt at some kind of demonstration of appreciation for my gesture but this is all one sided at the moment and it’s always been one sided. If I’m going to give something then I want something in return, plus this is Dakota we’re talking about; she’s probably banging someone. In fact she’s probably banging more than one someone, or at least, if she’s been true to form, she’s been banging one guy after another since September.
I suppose I’ll see her this weekend or next week and we’ll talk and maybe something will happen. I’m not exactly expecting an immediate exclusive sexual relationship with her, but I’d like some kind of indication that I’m special to her. I know storming off because she finds out that I was planning to fuck someone else kinda makes things obvious as does saying that we shouldn’t start a relationship because we don’t want children or to move in together rather than, “I don’t feel the same way” but something a bit more positive would be nice.
Oh and my accidental diet continues: I’ve lost 9lbs since I last bothered weighing myself, whenever that was. I suspect this is because I’ve only been out drinking on the weekend twice this year. Either way, I’m wasting away.