Pushing.

Application done. Online test done. Went for a drink with Jboy after work since I was feeling anxious and needed to chill. Definitely a day that reminds me that I have a disability, which sucks. At this stage I do wonder if things are actually going to work out, because I think they really are. Weird feeling.

Totally exhausted by the way, only got about five hours last night and I was in the office for seven hours which doesn’t sound much to normal people but it nigh on kills me sometimes. I know I’m pushing myself a bit too hard with everything but if it all works out I’m going to be laughing this time next year.

I can feel the hypomania kicking in.

I’ll still go for the MoD job……. It’s not much less money and it requires security clearance which might come in useful when I get to where I’m going, plus career progression is really good, which also might come in useful.

Did I mention that I’m a megalomaniac?

Bored.

I feel like I’m really changing, really growing. Everything I’ve learned up to now is now coming to fruition. I’m reaching the end of something and the start of something else. I suppose that whole period of my life that was centred on depression, from when I was 13 to the breakdown at 26 is now run it’s course. I’ve overcome that and I’m ready to really get started on life and my natural positivity, natural confidence and optimism, natural aggression and determination is coming through and it’s going to take me far.

2017 is going to be awesome.

 

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